Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Have you seen her?

No, she won’t beat you up on the playground, shove you in a locker, or shake you down for milk money……  

In fact, if you stay out of her way she may not bother you at all.

But don’t kid yourself, she’s there, she’s active, and she’s dangerous.

Sadly, I've personally observed her power. Sudden and intense, like a tornado she can wreak havoc on the unsuspecting and innocent, and does. Devoid of compassion and empathy, she is fully capable of demolishing all in her path…..before moving on.

Having witnessed the devastation of her victims, and their struggle to pick up the pieces…..I  can’t help but wonder…..

How many victims has she left behind?……How many will there be in the future?……How many even know she exists?

After all, she’s had years to practice. Not only has she molded her technique into an art form, but she  executes brilliantly.

Yes, she’s an adult now, but don’t let her fool you….

No she's not clenching her fist, but listen carefully to her words.....….



  1. There are those who bully in dripping sweet tones with "sweetheart" and "puddin'" and "bless your pea-pickin' heart" attached to thinly veiled ugliness. And I've seen those who conjure up tears from others within a five minute tirade...yes, I've seen "her". Thanks for the unveiling in your blogpost!

  2. Hi Chris,

    I must admit your response to my most made me smile a little.

    While the topic itself is sad, I can't help but find a little humor in the creative use and accuracy of your words.

    It helps to know that I am not the only one who sees through, and is frustrated by, her "thinly veiled ugliness".

    I truly appreciate your comment:-)

  3. Yes, children who have no boundaries can become adults with no boundaries. They want their own way, can't take a no, and are still mean. Bullies don't just push you into a fence, they can push you with just plain old mean words.
    I will help you build a fence.
    Have you read any of The Boundary Books by Townsend and Cloud? They also wrote one called, Safe People. I had a time in my life when I read those books daily.

    1. I a going to look up the Boundary Books.....I didn't even know they existed.....thank you so much, Pamela!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. Beautiful, Beautiful, Beautiful writing Darlene! Really made me think about this. Often times we think kids will grow out of that bully mentality - what if they don't? They grow into adults who bully. I know a few of them and it's so scarey.

    1. I am glad you enjoyed this, and appreciate your's a tough thing to put into words.....but having seen the process, and progression, and affects of bullying up close and personal, I decided it was worthy of a post . You are right, it really is scary.....thank you so much for your comment, Carrie.....I truly appreciate it:-)

  5. Although I'm hesitant to even admit this, I completely misinterpreted your post. As I was reading it I was certain you were personifying a disease. Concerning adult bullies...Well, unfortunately, some people just never grow up. It is a shame.. but I ain't got time for that. Bigger fish to fry. ;) - side note.. 10 day count down to the end begins dearie!

  6. Brighid, I love the fact that you always call it as you see it, and am in agreement with you in regard to those people who never grow up. While it is a shame, they are totally harmless., but, it's them I was talking about.

    Because of my deep respect for you, I feel it important to clarify the reasoning behind my post. It was not my intent to be petty; rather an attempt to expose the strategies and potential dangers of the (real life, honest to God, bullies) that intentionally target and humiliate others for purposes of control

    Due to the fact I have personally witnessed the "devastation" (tears, anguish, worthlessness) of the unsuspecting and's a problem I hold close to my heart.....and while I probably shouldn't carry a banner....I can't seem to help it.

    There are websites and books dedicated to the subject, and mental health professionals trained specifically help victims of adult bullying who suffer with depression.

    So, in a way, I guess am personifying..... not a disease, but a form of violence that we rarely talk about, but exists, and shouldn't be ignored.

    Side note response: We are doing great!!!!!!!!!!!! I look forward to reading your blogs over break.....and beyond....:-) Thank you for your comment:-) I always love reading what you have to say..